Neuheisel May Abandon One Piece of Offensive Roadkill to Nurture Another

The brilliant gambling offensive mind that is Rick Neuheisel may be once again returning to the velvety throne of Pac-10 head coaching.

Wait, isn't he currently directing the offensive juggernaut that is the Bodymore Ravens? Shiiiyt, maybe UCLA athletic director Dan Guerrero thinks he is interviewing applicants for head soccer coach.

We do think, however, Neuheisel to the Bruins would make the Pac-10 the deepest it has been in quite some time. What we don't understand here is why UCLA alumni would want to bring in a guy who sucks all the hope and livelihood from March Madness pools every year. Neuheisel is so good he ought to pull a Rose and wager a few dimes on himself to win the damn things.

To play it a little safer this time though, Rick should probably stick with the acceptable currency in collegiate sports, that of course being the players. We admit we definitely would tune into a televised rendition of Neuheisel vs. Carroll blue-chip blackjack or recruiting roulette.

Just don't let Erickson creep into the casino. That ol' devil driver would have his pistol out and the game upgraded to the Russian version at the flick of a chip.