Hall of fame skipper /Vladimir Guerrero bat magnet Tommy Lasorda is returning to the dugout. Yep, the ol' chubster will be leading the Dodgers into exhibitionist battle for eight split-squad games in Florida this March.
The move is win-win for both the Los Angeles organization and coach: LA is looking to improve its spring training record, and Tommy is looking to consume his weight in post-game spread baco bits.
We are the sports reporting equivalent of scrotal duct tape-peeling euthanasia. Our sources are worse than Kirk Herbstreit's. Our investigative techniques more perverse than Carl Monday's. We ride shotgun to BK drive-thrus with Joe Cullen. We are the 'shrooms that Josh Heytvelt eats, the 'Goose that Mo Clarett drinks. We will snipe your neurons, metaphorically. And dumb you down with bad metaphors, literally. Welcome to our dungeon.
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